Saturday, September 19, 2009

"JIFFY" Quality and Value Since 1930

The president of the Chelsea Milling Company in Chelsea, Michigan, where "JIFFY" mix is made, is named Howdy Holmes. Seriously.

I can't decide is that's an Evil Clown Name or a Porn Name. I'm sure Mr. Holmes is a wonderful guy. I bet he learned to kick some ass early.

The "JIFFY" mix field trip is very popular in grade school in Michigan. I remember we got got a box of one of their mixes; I think it was brownies but I can't be sure.

I wonder if that was the field trip I took in fourth grade; John Adams and I were riding in our teacher's car. Her name was Mrs. Watson (heh), she had a cool Tennielle haircut and wore a lot of earth tones. She drove us home from the field trip in her wood-paneled Pacer. We had stopped at a McDonald's at some point and John Adams threw up strawberry milkshake all over her car just as we were pulling into his driveway.

Good times.

We're having chili tonight, so we had to make some "JIFFY" mix corn muffins.

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Much to the relief of everyone who knows me, and everyone who calls me, I finally changed the ringtones of my cell phone. My ringer was Kid Rock, All Summer Long, and the incoming callers heard Bob Marley. I was sick of them, as well, but lazy. My ringtone now is The Cure, Friday I'm in Love and incoming callers will hear Jason Mraz, I'm Yours. There is only one problem; Whenever my phone rings now, I think, "Oh wow, that's the Cure. It's Friday I'm in Love. I love this song!" At that point, Martin or Dexter or Mia will tell me that my purse is ringing and I realize it's my phone and not the radio station in my head.

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I've suddenly become very fond of Rolling Rock beer. I've never been a big fan of beer but Rolling Rock lately tastes very good. You know,I have to work on that Indiana Ass, it just doesn't grow unassisted. Rolling Rock, no less.

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I really want pair of Rocket Buster Boots. Oh hell, if you're going to dream, dream big. I want a couple pair, at least. I love cowboy boots, I always have. Strange but true.

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My back went out again. This time, it was because I was laughing too hard and started to cough and twisted a muscle. Since I am allergic to Codeine, the doctor gave me muscle relaxants, and a Lidocaine patch to put on the pulled muscle. It was spasming right in front of her. She said, "I don't have to look to find this one!" I was dubious about the Lidocaine patch and was hoping for the heavy duty big guns of finer living through chemicals, but the Lidocaine patch was surprisingly helpful. I was rendered pain free, but not in a stupor.

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The weather couldn't be more beautiful. Sunny, warm, breezy, not a gale force wind. Indiana has perfect Indian summer.

3 comments:

judemiller1 said...

Michigan is having lovely weather too--cool in the mornings though, but nice enough to sit out on the porch and smoke by 11:00.

Ronni said...

It's 82 freaking degrees here, at 11:21 at night!

I am SO ready for Fall!

Ronni said...

I used to use the Jiffy cornbread mix, until I got the hang of making it from scratch. It's SOOOOO much better! But, if it weren't for the Jiffy, I never would have learned...